Sunday, August 25, 2024

New BURNZO CAST Episode! -- "Amateur Filmmaking at the Dawn of the Digital Age"

 



Enjoy this new podcast episode of mine: "Amateur Filmmaking at the Dawn of the Digital Age." Listen below or read the full episode transcript (also below).




BURNZO CAST Episode #9 - "Amateur Filmmaking at the Dawn of the Digital Age" (Air Date: 8/24/2024)


SYNOPSIS:

In this ninth episode of THE BURNZO CAST, Matt cuts to the chase and discusses all the amateur filmmaking he used to do between the years 2000 and 2004. This was truly the dawn of the digital age when digital video equipment - including video cameras, laptops and editing software - were first becoming available for amateurs to make no-budget DIY films with.



EPISODE TRANSCRIPT:


 

INTRO

 

Hello everyone and welcome to Episode #9 of THE BURNZO CAST. This is your host Matt Burns speaking. For the last three episodes, we talked about video games, but for THIS episode we’re going to switch gears and talk about something completely different. I want to talk about amateur filmmaking at the dawn of the digital age, which was around the Y2K area, give or take a couple of years. For me, there was a period of time between the year 2000 and 2004 where I was spending a lot of time making short amateur films and most of these films were made with the first generation of digital video camera and video editing equipment, some of the first consumer digital equipment to ever exist for video production. So, if you don’t mind, I would like to spend a few minutes discussing this period of time in my life when I discovered that semi-decent movies could be made with nothing but a simple digital video camera and a laptop.

 

But before we get into this episode, here’s a quick word from our sponsor:

 

[Radio Spot]

 

 

THE PODCAST

 

Ok, welcome back to THE BURNZO CAST. Again, this is episode #9, called “Amateur Filmmaking at the dawn of the digital age.” Let’s cut to the chase here and get right into this podcast. Shall we?

 

All right, let me take you back to the year 1998. I was a junior in high school at this time, around 17 years old. Up until this point in my life, I never really thought I would ever want to become a filmmaker or be interested in filmmaking. I mainly aspired to be one of three things. When I was really young, I wanted to be a professional basketball player, but I abandoned this dream by about the eighth grade or even sooner, mainly because I wasn’t all that good at basketball. I mean, I was pretty good. I played CYO basketball and went to basketball camp and such. But I wasn’t good enough to go pro.

 

I was also a big drummer and percussionist when I was young, so becoming a drummer in a rock band was definitely a dream of mine at one point.

 

More than anything else, though, I had this dream of becoming an actor. In fact, I wanted to be a child actor, not necessarily because I liked acting (although I did like acting), but because I had this fantasy of becoming Jodi Sweetin’s boyfriend who played Stephanie Tanner on the show Full House. I had a huge crush on Jodi Sweetin and I thought she’d be interested in me if I became a big child actor like herself. This dream unfortunately never manifested itself. If it did, you would have obviously heard about it. Jodi and I would have been in the Tiger Beat magazines as Hollywood’s biggest child star couple.

 

By the time I was in high school, Full House was off the air and I came to terms with the fact that it didn’t look like I was going to become a child actor in Hollywood or Stephanie Tanner’s boyfriend for that matter. I did, however, still figure I would grow up to be an actor in some shape or form and, although I did a lot of theater acting, I had my eyes set on movies or TV.

 

However, in my junior year of high school, there was a turning point in my life. As an elective course, I took a film studies class. We watched many films in this class, including but not limited to Nicholas Ray’s Rebel Without a Cause, Stanley Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey, Hitchcock’s Vertigo and, if my memory serves me correctly, To Kill a Mockingbird with Gregory Peck. I also have this memory of watching a quote “fun” movie at the end of the semester and that movie was Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.

 

Anyway, I walked away from this class at the end of the semester with a whole new fascination. I had always LIKED movies and I was interested in acting in them, but now I was interested in film as a means of artistic expression and I was also interested in how to make films.

 

When it came time to look at colleges that next summer, I concluded that I wanted to go to school for film. This was mainly because film was all new to me and it was something I wanted to learn more about. I still wanted to act and play the drums in bands and such, but I didn’t see it as worthwhile going to school for acting or percussion since I could kind of do all that on my own. I was learning film as a new skill I could add to my talents, so going to a film school made the most sense to me.

 

After a lot of different college touring, I narrowed my choices down to two colleges: Emerson College and Boston University. In the end, I went with BU because it seemed like they were less intensive about its film program. I wanted to make sure I got a well-rounded education. BU would expose me to a lot of different Communication classes and liberal arts courses, humanities etc. I wasn’t sure I wanted to get super intensive into film, so this sounded like the better path to go down.

 

As it turned out, though, I never really took a film course at BU until my second semester sophomore year. In hindsight, that was fine but maybe at the time I would have preferred to start getting into the film courses a liiiitle earlier. It wasn’t a huge deal, though. Because by about halfway through my freshman year, I started teaching myself filmmaking. And I was able to do this because the year 2000, Y2K, was essentially the dawn of the digital age. There were relatively cheap and consumer-friendly filmmaking tools available for me to purchase and learn how to use, including digital video cameras that shot on MiniDV tapes, powerful laptops and user-friendly editing software. I didn’t have to wait to learn filmmaking at BU. I could start learning it on my own.

 

For a video camera, I went to a store in Norwood, MA. called “The Camera Company” and bought this camera called the Canon Optura PI. It cost around $1200, I believe. In hindsight, this was a great camera. It had very crisp video quality for its time. You could shoot in black and white and there were a lot of different effects that you could use, most of which were cheesy and impractical, in my opinion. But there was an image stabilizer on this camera that blew me away. Cameras I’ve had in later years shook with every single little movement but the Canon Optura PI had an image stabilizer so awesome it was almost like you were shooting with a SteadiCam rig.

 

As far as editing software goes, the very first version of Final Cut Pro was newly available at this time, but it was a little too complicated for ME, an 18-year-old, to learn. There was a less complex, user-friendly software that had just come out called iMovie, so I decided to get that instead. At that time, it didn’t come pre-loaded onto Apple computers, so I had to pay about fifty dollars or so and buy it separately. But it ended up being a great program for a beginner filmmaker like myself and, if you think about it, even a simple program like iMovie was way better than, say, a Steenbeck flatbed editing machine that you had to use in the olden days. Or, in video, you had to use those linear tape-to-tape machines…that is, use two tapes to edit something, one tape being the raw video source and then the other tape containing the edited sequences of the shots from your source tape. I used a tape-to-tape machine in a high school TV production class circa 1998.

 

And for a laptop? Well, I already had one of the best laptops on the market, at least at that time. This was the Apple PowerBook G3 (the Pismo model, I think) and I got this for a high school graduation gift the summer before I started at BU. Apple was running ads in magazines that said you could use the PowerBook G3 with a digital video camera and Final Cut Pro (or, in my case, iMovie) and that’s all you needed to start making your own movies and video productions. I remember the camera featured in these ads was a Canon but a notch or two better than mine. It was called something like the Canon XL1, I believe. This was a more professional camera for sure but it was a tad too expensive for me at the time. The Canon Optura PI would suit me well enough.

 

Oh, and I forgot one more key piece of equipment: a 4-6pin Firewire cable. Remember Firewire? Before USB-C cables and lightning cables and such, there were Firewire cables and Firewire hard drives. At the time, these were the fastest connections you could get for your computer. In order to import video from a camera to your computer, you needed a connection that was fast enough because raw digital video packed a lot of data. A Firewire cable provided that fast connection you needed. So you would hook the cable into a 4-pin port on your video camera and then connect the camera to your laptop via a 6-pin FireWire port on the laptop. My PowerBook G3 had at least two Firewire ports on it, along with several USB ports, S-video ports, a VGA external monitor port, microphone input, headphone output and maybe a couple other ports I don’t remember. Where most laptops today only have a couple ports on them (mainly USB-C ports), the laptops of the Y2K era had ports up the wazoo. Apple has certainly gone in a more minimalist route over the years, probably because they want their laptops to be as light as possible. 

 

Anyway, once I had all my equipment ready to go –the camera, the laptop, the iMovie and the trusty Firewire cable—I started making lots of videos and eventually made my first short movie, which was a horror film called GUTTER.

 

I shot GUTTER right around December of the year 2000. In the movie, I play a psycho out to murder my friend Tim for no reason that is explained in the movie. Tim is portrayed as a big fan of the show Full House, but other than that, we don’t get much character development. Basically, the movie opens with me saying something creepy to the audience in voice over, there are some brief opening titles and then we see creepy images of the winter. Then we cut to the inside of a house, Tim is watching Full House with his friend Mark and then we cut to me breaking and entering into the house, then I go down into the basement and kill Tim but Mark has already disappeared with no explanation. Talk about a huge continuity error. In fact, this movie was so flawed that it basically made Ed Wood look like Steven Spielberg.

 

After I do the murder, I pose in a Christ-like formation and then the movie cuts to the end credits. Again, there is no explanation as to why I committed the murder and why I pose in Christ-like formation. Maybe I was just supposed to be the devil incarnate—who knows? No, it wasn’t the greatest movie ever made, but it was a decent first film.

 

I shot GUTTER in Black and White, mainly because I liked how the black and white video looked and thought it was aesthetically appropriate for the movie’s dark content. I even shot a couple gory scenes in the movie where I used Caro syrup and red food dye for blood. I later learned, however, that it was easier to use Hershey’s chocolate syrup for blood when you’re shooting in black and white. I think legend has it that Alfred Hitchcock used chocolate syrup for blood in the movie Psycho. That’s the best and easiest way to go, in my opinion.

 

After editing GUTTER on iMovie, I was left feeling rather impressed with what I had made. Again, not that GUTTER was a great movie, but I found it amazing that all you had to do was throw a few shots together on iMovie (in a creative and crafty way, mind you) and you could create the illusion for an audience that a murder is taking place. It sounds like a cliché, but it was definitely like magic. Just the fact that you could get a couple friends and use your smalltime digital video equipment and then make a short, ten-minute movie … well, this made you feel empowered. You didn’t need Hollywood. You could literally do it all yourself or at least with a few friends. I remember saying to myself at the time that I could just keep doing this my whole life and be fine only doing this. I don’t need to go to Hollywood. If I have a story I want to share with the world, I can just do it with my amateur equipment and that would be fine with me.

 

That next spring of 2001, I decided to make another movie. This one was definitely more ambitious and definitely involved more planning. It was going to be an “action movie” and I would call it BRITISH DINGO FROM IRELAND (the name came from my inability to speak in an Irish accent without it sounding either British or Australian). Running about 12 minutes in length, BRITISH DINGO FROM IRELAND starred me as this dude named the British Dingo from Ireland who does a big drug deal with these shady characters named Pristine and Kado. But Kado and Pristine try to screw him over, a big gun battle ensues and then the Dingo comes out on top. Not only does he keep the drugs but he keeps the money, too. It’s a win-win for Mr. Dingo.

 

BRITISH DINGO FROM IRELAND was very influenced by the movie Boondock Saints that was popular at the time. Like Boondock Saints, BRITISH DINGO was kind of an action, drug and gangster movie that took place in South Boston. Like I said, I got ambitious in this movie. I used toy guns for guns and we lit a firecracker to simulate a bullet ricocheting off a beer can. I didn’t have any blanks or squibs at my disposal, but through the magic of editing and sound effects, I was able to create the illusion that a gun battle was taking place, just like with GUTTER where I created the illusion that a murder was taking place. Editing was definitely my best friend in the whole wide world. In a later movie I did called GAS, later retitled ONLY ENTERTAINMENT, I created an illusion of a fast car chase through the magic of editing. But I’ll get to GAS in a moment.

 

When I finished BRITISH DINGO, I was very proud of it (even though it still wasn’t that great of a movie), but I wanted more people than just my friends to see the movie. This was long before the days of YouTube and Vimeo, but there was this website called iFilm.com that, for a small fee, I submitted my movie to and they uploaded it onto their website for the world to see. 

 

To promote the movie, I went around town and hung up fliers at local businesses, at least at the places that would allow me to do so. Remember, social media was non-existent at this point, no Facebook or Twitter, not even Myspace, so you had to literally get your boots on the ground and hang up real fliers in the real world. 

 

My movie was live on the ifilm.com website for about two months (I think) but it did get about 50 views, which, to me, was a big deal. I mean, that was like having a movie premiere and having 50 whole people in the audience. I, of course, get a lot more views than that on YouTube these days, but I was still blown away that 50 whole people had seen a movie that I basically made with my own bare hands.

 

After BRITISH DINGO FROM IRELAND, I made the aforementioned movie GAS, which, like I said before, I ended up renaming to ONLY ENTERTAINMENT about a year later. GAS was even more ambitious than BRITISH DINGO. This was my first movie I made in color and it was all about chase sequences, both in a car but also on foot. The plot involves two teens named Fritz and Theo played by my friends Tim and Mark. They play Mario Kart, one beats the other, I think it’s Theo that is pissed that Fritz won, or maybe the other way around, and then a real-life car chase ensues between Fritz and Theo’s bodyguard played by my friend Jeremy. The movie is about fantasy being blurred with reality or something along those lines. After the car chase there is a foot chase and then a big climax that takes place under high tension wires. I actually just took a moment to rewatch this movie and it’s been a while since I watched it so I sort of watched it with a fresh pair of eyes, almost as though somebody else made it. Well, I was laughing my ass off, especially at the end. I was nearly in tears. It's a pretty good amateur movie if I do say so myself. Bizarre as anything but good and fun.

 

Also notable about GAS was that I was experimenting with stop-motion animation at this time. I was big into the filmmaker Tim Burton and loved the movie Nightmare Before Christmas, which, of course, was shot entirely with stop-motion photography. Feeling inspired by the movie, I decided I wanted to try doing stop-motion photography myself. In GAS, I tried using stop-motion photography to create the illusion that matchbox cars were moving on their own. Shooting the cars frame by frame was too difficult to do on a video camera but basically what I would do was press record on the camera and then stop, then move the car a tad, press record again and then stop and keep doing this. On iMovie, I could tighten the shots a bit so that they were only a few frames long and, abracadabra, you got stop-motion animation. To my surprise, the end result ended up looking great, like the matchbox cars were actually moving on their own, and you can see these animation shots in the opening title sequence of GAS.

 

Now, the first version of the movie, entitled GAS, was pretty good but I ultimately thought it could be better, so about a year later, I had just finished reading the book by Robert Rodriguez called Rebel Without a Crew, I felt all inspired, so I went ahead and reedited GAS and this new version of the movie was definitely the superior version. In fact, it was so superior that I thought I should give it a new title and that title became ONLY ENTERTAINMENT, named after a song by the band Bad Religion.

 

Shortly after finishing GAS was when I actually started taking my first production course at BU. It was called Film Production One and this was when I officially learned how to make films and we’re talking actual films here, shot on 16mm film. We used a Bolex in this class, which was one of those cameras that you wound up with a hand crank and then you could shoot for up to 30 seconds or so without any battery-power whatsoever. Then we would edit on Steenbeck flatbed editing machines, which was extremely tedious, especially when you were used to digital editing like I was at that point, but the end product was more rewarding because, let’s face it, no video, even to this day, looks better than actual film. Plus, the whole process of editing a film with your own bare hands, literally splicing shots together to create an edited sequence, was a process that I feel every filmmaker should experience at least once in their lifetime. Editing a film like that makes you feel more like a craftsman, kind of like you’re doing blue-collar manual labor, while editing a film on a computer almost feels more like office work. There’s definitely a difference.

 

I ended up making three films in my Production One course, two of which were edited on the Steenbeck. The first film I made was actually an in-camera edit, meaning you carefully made a shot list for a short film and shot your film shot-by-shot, in sequence, so that when you projected the roll of film on a screen you would already have an edited film. No other editing was allowed. I guess the purpose of this project was to get you to be prepared as a filmmaker. If you spent a lot of time planning your film out and making a shot list and storyboards etc., very little editing would ever be needed. In other words, this was an exercise in pre-production and stressed the importance of putting a lot of time and effort into the pre-production phase of film production.

 

For my first film, the in-camera-edit, I made this little movie called UNDERWEAR REVENGE. This was about a bitter homeless transient who gets revenge on all his enemies by leaving his soiled underpants in places where his enemies will have no choice but to touch them (for example, in the film, he leaves his soiled underpants in the purse of a girl he doesn’t like). Yeah, this was a weird film for sure. For the role of the transient, I casted a fellow BU student named Jake who had an interesting look to him. Long hair. Beard. Kind of looked like a cross between Jesus and Charles Manson. And I actually ended up casting him in several of my other films…I think four in all.

 

For my second film, which I DID edit on the Steenback, I made a film called MENTAL PUBERTY, which was also about a homeless transient who is carving a jack-o-lantern on a sidewalk and the carving of the jack-o-lantern is supposed to symbolize him digging into his disturbed psyche or something like that. I had a lot of fun thinking of ways to shoot the carving of the jack-o-lantern, including one shot where I actually carved a hole in the back of the pumpkin, and shot the camera through the eyes, nose and mouth of the jack-o-lantern, the end result being like a masking effect. It was basically like a POV shot from inside the pumpkin. I also experimented with flash frames in this project. I would take three or four frames of a shot and splice them into a sequence to create a flash-frame effect. Why the three or four frames? Because I found that splicing in just one frame was too quick, something that would only be useful if you wanted to have subliminal messages in your film, but in my case, I wanted the viewer to consciously see these images, so they needed to be longer than simply one frame.

 

The third film I made in my Production One class was called ACTAEON: PORTRAIT OF A PEEPING TOM and this was a black comedy, kind of inspired by Ed Wood’s film Glen or Glenda. I thought it would be funny to make a documentary-like film about a Peeping Tom, who, through voice over, tries to explain to the audience why he peeps and tries to justify why he peeps. This was definitely a strange film but that’s how I wanted it to be because that’s how Glen or Glenda was: strange. Although this film wasn’t as well-received as my MENTAL PUBERTY film, a few months later, I was showing some of my films to friends and one of my friends’ fathers happened to be in the room. He really got the black humor of the Peeping Tom film and was impressed with the movie. That’s all I needed to hear, that at least one person out there got what I was trying to do and appreciated the dark and more subtle humor.

 

About a year later, I took my second film production course at BU and this was called Film Production 2. We still shot on film in this course, but we actually ended up ditching Steenbeck editing machines and instead edited on the Avid, which is editing software that I think is pretty much obsolete these days, although I just looked it up and it seems like the opposite is true: that is, it still seems to be the standard for high-end film and video production, especially in Hollywood. Who knew? Because it seems to me like everyone is using Adobe Premiere these days. Anyway, yes, in Film Production 2, we ditched the flatbed editing machines and started editing on Avid. The CEO of Dreamworks animation Jeffrey Katzenberg was a BU alum and had a son who went to BU, so he donated a bunch of money to the school for a digital editing lab with several computers, all of which had Avid software on them, external FireWire drives…the works. BU saw the writing on the wall and decided it was time to go the way of digital.

 

In this Film Production 2 course, I still shot on 16mm film but then we would get the film transferred to MiniDV tape and then edit the films digitally on Avid. Technically this was like doing an offline workprint of the film and, once you were done, you would conform your edited digital workprint to the original film negative and then make actual film prints of your edited movie, but we weren’t going to go that far. We would just edit on video and screen our films on video, but again, the point was to ultimately go back to film once you had a digital video workprint completed. You may have no idea what I’m talking about right now, it’s a little complicated. Basically what you’re doing is shooting on film, editing on video because it’s easier, but then you want to match your film negative to your edited video so that your final film is on film but now mirrors how you edited your video. Get it now? Probably not. Sorry, I’m horrible at explaining things.

 

 Anyway, for these films in Production 2 we could shoot on color film if we liked, but I still shot on black and white, both because it was easier and also I liked how 16mm black and white film looked aesthetically. For a camera, we upgraded from the Bolex to the Arriflex and recorded synch sound on a NAGRA machine. This was actually the first time we used synch sound in our film: that is, recorded audio in synch with the film while we shot a scene. Dialogue was essentially synch sound, while in my previous films, if there was any dialogue, it was done in voice over.

 

My first film was called SYMPATHY FOR HITLER’S SOUL and this was a very short three-minute piece about Hitler’s soul confronting God after Hitler dies and complaining to God for putting him into such an evil body. It was a cool unique idea, if I do say so myself, and it was somewhat profound as well. This was a film that definitely made you think more than previous films I did. Some people have since compared it to the Pixar movie Soul but only in the sense that the film’s concepts are somewhat similar. Where did I come up with this idea, you may be asking? I’m not sure, but I do have a vague memory of it popping into my memory one day when I was in BU’s Mugar library. I think I was basically thinking about the idea of souls and how we may not choose what body we come into when we’re born on earth. I was also thinking about the Holocaust and whether it was Hitler’s mind or soul that led him to be so evil. What is it that makes up the human identity? The mind or the soul and if the mind leads us to do evil things, should our soul be held accountable? I mean, if we suffer from a mental illness that makes us do evil, is our soul still evil? Or does that remain pure throughout the illness?

 

You can view SYMPATHY FOR HITLER’S SOUL on my YouTube channel if you like. The best way to find it is just search on YouTube for “Matt Burns: Sympathy for Hitler’s Soul.” (Click HERE to view).

 

The second film I did in my Production 2 course was called THE SECOND BEAST and, although this was a group film I made with three other classmates, I did end up writing the movie and co-directing it and also starring in it. This wasn’t my plan, really, but we got to a point in the semester where my group didn’t have any ideas for a film and we were running out of time. Over spring break, I read a book called Cracking the Apocalypse Code and instantly got the idea for THE SECOND BEAST. The basic premise was this: An obsessive decoder of the Bible discovers that his best friend is the second beast prophecied in chapter 13 of the Book of Revelation. Or at least so he thinks. He might be a little crazy, but that’s up for the audience to decide. I played this obsessive decoder.

 

I remember part of our assignment was to first make a rough cut of the film, then show that cut to our classmates and professor and have them critique it. The rough cut was really bad and the criticism was harsh. This was mostly because we didn’t have a whole lot of time to edit up until that point. One issue we had was that we didn’t shoot enough coverage and we found ourselves lacking a few insert shots that we desperately needed. Due to a lack of time, we couldn’t go back and do these shots on film, so what I ended up doing was shooting these inserts by myself with my trusty Canon Optura PI video camera. Film and digital video cut together like oil and vinegar, so those shots ended up standing out as awkward, but we didn’t have any other alternative but to use them. 

 

We did, however, have more time to edit the film, so we went back into the editing room and we made THE SECOND BEAST much much better. In fact, the final cut was so much better that our classmates and our professor were kind of shocked by how much it had improved. I think our professor ended up giving us an A- or maybe even an A.

 

The year was 2004 now and that summer I ended up editing a movie I had shot that previous winter on my own. This movie was called WENDEL’S REVENGE. With WENDEL’S REVENGE, I basically took the concept of my short film UNDERWEAR REVENGE, expanded on it and what I got was WENDEL’S REVENGE. I guess this movie was one half horror movie and the other half revenge movie. Wendel is this outcast who is bullied by a jerk named Rat Bonze. Rat Bonze gets a pair of soiled underwear and does a drive-by under-pansting where he tosses his soiled briefs out the car window at Wendel’s face. Wendel is rollerblading at the time, so the briefs blind him and he goes crashing into a trash barrel. He’s mega pissed off, so he tracks down Rat Bonze and gets his revenge by beating him into an oblivion and in the end, he rips Rat Bonze’s heart out of his chest, Mortal-Kombat-style. Yes, this was a bizarre movie, not as thought-provoking as my other movies, but definitely a fun one.

 

What makes WENDEL’S REVENGE unique is that it was the first film I edited, not on iMovie, but on Final Cut Pro. Having learned Avid at school, I realized that Final Cut Pro was not much different. My parents had given me Final Cut Pro Express for Christmas or for my birthday or something like that, probably around the 2004 area. Final Cut Express was a slightly more user-friendly version of Final Cut Pro. The only main difference I found between Express and regular Final Cut was that there were a finite amount of sound tracks you could use when you were editing your film, maybe around five or so, maybe a few more (possibly 8)? Whereas in Final Cut Pro, I think you could edit with unlimited soundtracks. What this means in practical terms is that if you had a sequence that required a lot of sound layered on top of each other, then you needed to use a lot of soundtracks during the editing process. For example, if you were editing a car accident sequence, you would maybe need some dialogue (that is, car passengers saying “Oh no, we’re crashing”) and then one track having tires screeching, another track having the crash sound, the other track having glass break, the other track having ambient city noise, the other track having a horn honking etc. and these tracks had to be layered on top of each other, so you needed multiple tracks and I do know that in Final Cut Express these tracks were more limited than in normal Final Cut Pro. But that’s the only difference I remember between the two programs.

 

Anyway, yes, WENDEL’S REVENGE was the first movie I edited on Final Cut Pro and I was proud that I had graduated to a more complex editing software. I don’t think I ever edited anything on iMovie ever again. For the next 20 years or so, I would keep editing on Final Cut Pro. To this day, I only tried Adobe Premiere once, didn’t like it and just kept updating my Final Cut Pro software. I even edit my podcast episodes, including the one you’re listening to right now, on Final Cut Pro.

 

After I graduated from college in 2004, I definitely got more into writing than filmmaking. I was writing both a lot of screenplays and a lot of novels. I did, however, do a ton of video production, all kinds of wedding videography and corporate videos, marketing videos, things like that … and over the years I have probably edited hundreds and hundreds of videos. Amidst all this video production, I did make a few more short movies, a short paranormal documentary called A PARALLEL WORLD and two short comedies called SO SORRY and WE’RE GOOD. When you look back on it, the speed in which digital video technology has advanced over the past 20-plus years is staggering. I was shooting in HD by 2009 and now there’s 4K and beyond.

 

Although the technology is insane today, I do feel privileged having been about at the right age to get into digital filmmaking at the dawn of when the digital age was first taking off. My laptop was one of the first laptops you could edit digital video on. My camera was one of the first consumer, user-friendly digital video cameras. Firewire technology was brand new and helped make digital video editing possible. And the version of iMovie that I was using to edit my films on was the very first version of iMovie ever. When I did finally move onto Final Cut Pro, that was basically the very first version of Final Cut Pro ever. Yes, this was truly the dawn of the digital age and I feel so privileged to have been able to experience this dawning as it was happening in real-time. I mean, in a sense, I was a part of this dawning. That makes me feel kind of special.

 

I definitely miss those early days of digital video. It was easier to do but not too easy like it is today. I mean, today, anybody who has an iPhone can shoot and edit video. Everybody is a videographer. Everybody is a digital editor. Practically everyone has a YouTube channel. And although I guess this is good in some sense, I think the fact that it’s so easy means we get oversaturated with content, most of which isn’t worth our time to watch. We always look at the past through rose-colored lenses but I do think that those early days of digital video, shooting on MiniDV, editing on a PowerBook laptop with Firewire technology and iMovie software, Final Cut Pro, or even Avid … I do think it was a special time in technological history and maybe even in our evolution as a human species.


 

OUTRO

 

All right, everyone, that concludes episode #9 of THE BURNZO CAST. I do hope you enjoyed this episode and maybe if you were making little DIY movies 20 years ago like I was, then perhaps you could relate to everything that was discussed in this podcast. If you want to learn more about my amateur movies and my early days of digital filmmaking, be sure to check out my book Garage Movie: My Adventures Making Weird Films available on Amazon.com. More episodes to come and please do me a flavah. Be well. Take care of yourself, BURNZO NATION!


 

 


MATT BURNS is the author of several novels, including Weird MonsterSupermarket Zombies! and Johnny Cruise. He’s also written numerous memoirs, including GARAGE MOVIE: My Adventures Making Weird FilmsMY RAGING CASE OF BEASTIE FEVERJUNGLE F’NG FEVER: MY 30-YEAR LOVE AFFAIR W/ GUNS N’ ROSES and I TURNED INTO A MISFIT! Check out these books (and many more) on his Amazon author page HERE.

 



Other trending articles by Matt Burns that may be of interest to you:

 

My Childhood Obsession with Rambo

 

Video Store Memories


Revisiting the Blair Witch Project

 

A Love Letter to the Emerald Square Mall (about the death of the shopping mall age)


NEVER FORGET the Fun-O-Rama (a traveling carnival memoir)


Some Wicked Good Times: A Love Letter to Newbury Comics


I Dream of Dream Machine (a memoir of the local video arcade)


Skateboarding in the 1990s


PROXOS IN THE PLEX: A Goldeneye 007 N64 Retrospective

 

100 DAYS of ZELDA: Revisiting Ocarina of Time

 

I USED TO BE A GAMER: The 8-bit Nintendo Years


WAAF Goes Off the Air


Heeeeeeeeeeeeeere’s Charlie (a story about Burns’ recurring nightmares featuring Charlie Chaplin)


Remembering That Time I Tried to Stop a Shoplifter at the Wrentham Outlets


The Strange, Surreal Moment of Being Called a DILF Inside a Panera Bread Restaurant on a Wednesday Afternoon


Weird Times en la Weirdioteca

 

RIP PowerBook G3


Getting Your Novel Done

 

Getting Your Screenplay Done

 

Making Your Good Writing Great


Writing the Sequel

 

Writing the Trilogy


No-No, Learn to Love the Rejection: Some Sage Advice for Writers in Search of an Agent or Publisher

 

The Story Behind Supermarket Zombies!


The Story Behind The Woman and the Dragon

Saturday, August 3, 2024

My Childhood Obsession with Rambo



When I was a kid, I rarely watched any “Kids movies” unless they were on the Disney Channel, which was the only paid “movie station” my family ever had when I was growing up in the 1980s and 1990s. No HBO. No Cinemax. No Showtime. No “Movie Channel,” either. Remember The Movie Channel? Whatever happened to The Movie Channel and also why did they not come up with a more creative name for that channel? Oh woops, just looked it up and The Movie Channel still exists. Boy, I’m off to a great start here, aren’t I? Maybe next time I should do a little research before I start writing an article like this. Of course, I could always edit out the fact that I didn’t know The Movie Channel still existed, but then I would also have to edit out the fact that I just said I would edit out that I didn’t know the Movie Channel still existed. I might as well cut my losses, quietly move on with this article and pretend the last few sentences never happened.

 

So … uh … anyway … when I went to the local video store as a child—Video Paradise was its name—I don’t remember ever renting one single Disney movie or any Family movie for that matter. In fact, I never knew where the Kids and Family section even was until many years later. Video Paradise was actually two floors and the Family section was in the creepy basement that had the buzzing fluorescent lights. Why put the Family section in the basement? Seems like an odd choice, but that’s where it was. Granted, the basement was a bright basement, certainly not dark, but it creeped me out nevertheless, mainly because it was quiet and deserted down there. You know, it was one of those basements that got you nervous in your belly and would even make you have to run to the bathroom. There is something about being alone in a deserted section of a building with buzzing fluorescent lights; for some reason, it makes you have to go to the bathroom. Same thing happens in the “stacks” section of libraries that are quiet and deserted with buzzing fluorescent lights. Talk about a natural laxative, folks. Don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about. Oh, stop playing dumb with me.

 

Where was I, though? I’m sort of rambling here. Sorry.

 

I guess what I was trying to communicate is that, no, I never rented any Kids or Family movies from the local Video Paradise video store. Whenever I went there to rent movies, usually with my dad, we would automatically go to one section of the video store and one section only: 

 

The ‘Action’ section.

 

In fact, for a long time, I don’t think I even realized there were other kinds of movies out there, like comedies or horror films. I thought all movies were Action by default since those were all I was exposed to as a child. I was maybe about four or five years old at this time and, despite my young age, there was no type of action film that was deemed by my parents (or at least by my dad) to be too violent for me. Whether it be Arnold Schwarzenegger movies (Commando comes to mind as a frequent rental of ours), Jean-Claude Van Damme movies (Double Impact was a favorite), Chuck Norris movies (Delta Force made multiple appearances in our VCR), Steven Seagal movies (Marked for Death and Under Siege were the best of his movies, in my opinion), Sylvester Stallone movies (Cobra was a go-to rental of ours)—no action film was off the table.

 

There was, however, an issue if there was sex in the movie and especially nudity. Violence? Totally fine. But sex and nudity? Well, that was when I would have to close my eyes and my dad would fast-forward through the sex scene, which was usually brief and usually towards the end of the second Act of the film, maybe around the 60-70-minute mark. This was, of course, if my dad hadn’t screened the movie ahead of time. Oftentimes, he would have already determined that a movie had too much sex in it for me to watch. But sometimes he would be caught off guard and have to do the fast-forward trick.

 

One action film that we rented frequently, mainly because there was plenty of great action and no sex whatsoever (there is only one brief and tasteful kissing scene in it) was the movie First Blood: Part 2, aka Rambo 2, starring, of course, Sylvester Stallone as Rambo. I was too young at the time to understand the backstory of John Rambo, how he was this elite, Congressional-Medal-of-Honor-winning, ex-Green Beret haunted by PTSD from his time doing special forces missions in Nam. All I knew was that Rambo was jacked—and I mean really ripped, especially in First Blood: Part 2—looked so badass, and the film had some great action in it, including tons of machine guns and, even better, fireball-like explosions. 


First Blood: Part 2 movie poster

Now, I should note that I never saw the first Rambo, i.e. First Blood, until several years later when I saw it on TV and was somewhat turned off because it was more of a drama—a psychological film about Vietnam veteran PTSD—than it was an action film, although there was still plenty of action in it. Today, however, I have great respect for First Blood. I think it’s probably the best film in the Rambo franchise, not in terms of action, but in terms of story. In the movie, Rambo is an ex-Vietnam-vet-turned drifter who finds himself in a small town in Washington State, searching for an old friend of his from the war. He learns, however, that his friend has died from cancer due to being exposed to Agent Orange. As Rambo continues to drift through town in a state of despondency, a cop thinks Rambo is nothing but a filthy drifter and he starts harassing him. Rambo gets upset. The cop subsequently arrests him. Then, the cops in the town jail beat on Rambo, this aggression triggers Rambo to have PTSD-type flashbacks and he essentially thinks he is back fighting in a war again … only now the enemy is the cops, not the Viet Cong. Action ensues …

 

I especially like the scene at the end of the movie where Rambo basically has a psychological meltdown and tells Colonel Trautman of all the horror he witnessed during his time in Vietnam. Most of what comes out of Rambo’s mouth are mere fragments of incohesive sentences, something about his fellow Green Beret buddy being blown to pieces. It’s hard to understand exactly what Rambo witnessed, but we get the general idea and it sounds horrible.

 


Rambo's nervous breakdown scene in First Blood

 

So, yes, today I give many a kudos to First Blood.

 

As a child, however, I was all about First Blood: Part 2.

 

This movie opens with Rambo in a prison work camp hammering away at rocks in a quarry. Colonel Trautman pays him a visit and asks if Rambo would be interested in doing a covert mission for the United States military, possibly in exchange for a presidential pardon of Rambo’s remaining prison sentence. The mission is to see if any American POWs are still being held in a Vietnam prison camp that Rambo himself had once escaped from during the war. Rambo agrees to the mission, not necessarily because he’ll get a pardon from his prison sentence, but mostly because he’s interested in saving POWs. Although he’s only supposed to take pictures of the POWs in these camps and not engage with the enemy, Rambo has every intention of saving the POWs if/when he finds them. As it turns out, POWs ARE found in the camp, Rambo tries to help them, he is spotted by the enemy, plenty of action ensues …

 

I don’t remember how many times we rented First Blood: Part 2 at the Video Paradise video store, but I do know that, at some point, I managed to tape the movie off of TV via our new and trusty Mitsubishi-brand VCR and this meant the movie was effectively mine to own and I could therefore watch it at any time. Actually, now that I think of it, I believe what happened is we had free Showtime or HBO for a weekend, First Blood: Part Two was on and, boom, I popped a VHS tape into my VCR and hit ‘record’. Remember how they used to do those free promotional weekends of HBO, Showtime, Cinemax, Movie Channel etc.? Sometimes you would have all four of the movie channels free or maybe even five, including Disney, but my family of course already paid to have the Disney channel. You felt like you hit the jackpot whenever you stumbled upon this promotion. You would be flipping through the channels and then, all of a sudden, you realized you had HBO … and then Showtime … and then Cinemax … and, yes, The Movie Channel! … and you would then procure as many blank VHS tapes as possible and get ready to record movie after movie … after movie …

 

Anyway, yes, I had First Blood: Part 2 recorded on a VHS tape in its entirety—even sans commercials—and I watched this movie obsessively. And I mean obsessively. Now that I reflect upon it, I guess I have an obsessive personality, because I tend to get obsessive about many things. For example, in the year 2006, I became obsessed with the album “Appetite for Destruction” by Guns N’ Roses (you can actually read about this obsession in my book Jungle F’ng Fever: My 30-Year Love Affair with Guns N’ Roses). Also, in late middle school and high school, I became obsessive about the Beastie Boys and bought every Beastie Boys T-shirt I could find (read about my Beastie Boys obsession in my book My Raging Case of Beastie Fever). Same thing happened with the band The Misfits during the summer between my senior year of high school and freshman year of college (read about this obsession in my Kindle single book I Turned into a Misfit!). I also tend to get obsessive about songs; if I like a particular song, I will listen to it over and over again, basically on a loop. There have been other times when I have become obsessive about collecting cassette tapes. Or DVDs. I guess what I’m trying to get at here is that I apparently had this obsessive personality, pretty much since I was a child, because watching First Blood: Part 2 literally became an obsession of mine.

 

In fact, I remember, sometime in the late-1980s, my sister went off to camp in New Hampshire for the summer and when she came back, she found me on the couch in our finished basement downstairs, watching First Blood: Part 2. I specifically remember her saying, “I see that not much has changed with you.”

 

Why did I like the movie so much? Well, I think I liked it because it was a simple, straight-forward action film with lots of gun battles and explosions. Rambo was also a very heroic character and, just like any little boy out there, I liked stories about heroes. Why is that? I mean, why do boys like these kinds of stories? I guess it’s in the little-boy DNA—I can’t intellectualize any other answer to such a question. For better or for worse, most boys like action, war, military stuff, explosions, guns and heroes. Rambo 2 had all of that and mostly that and that only. In other words, it was light on story, heavy on action.

 

My obsession with Rambo went beyond merely watching the movie over and over again. I acquired multiple Rambo action figures at the local Kay Bee Toys store and got a few others for birthday or Christmas gifts. 

 

This is the Rambo action figure I had


I also specifically remember stumbling upon a Rambo toy kit in, of all places, a Christmas Tree Shop located in Dennis, Massachusetts (i.e. on Cape Cod). This kit included a plastic replica of Rambo’s badass survival knife, a red bandana, a replica of the jade Buddha choker necklace that Rambo wears in the movie for good luck, but it also came with this extremely authentic-looking pistol that made a popping sound when you pulled its trigger. This was the late-1980s, my friends, so these were the days when toy guns could still legally look like real guns. By 1992, a federal law was passed that said you had to put bright orange tips on toy guns so that they wouldn’t be mistaken for real guns.[i] If I remember correctly, I believe this law came about after an incident where a child in California got shot by a cop because the cop mistook the kid’s laser tag gun for a real gun.[ii] Remember laser tag? That game was pretty big in the ‘80s, but I’ll stop talking about laser tag before I go off on another tangent.

 


1980s Laser Tag commercial


Anyway, for better or for worse, the Rambo pistol that came with the toy kit looked so real and I loved that gun and I mean LOVED that gun. I had a lot of toy guns as a child (what boy didn’t back in the 1980s?), but that one Rambo pistol was definitely my favorite and I remember having that thing forever, well into the 1990s. As the years went by, the popping function stopped working and the gun also got significantly damaged. I remember the plastic breaking off in parts, I could eventually see into the innards of the gun, and I saw that the clicking of the trigger functioned via some sort of rubber-band elastic on the inside. I don’t ever remember getting rid of that gun, but I basically kept it until it was unusable.

 

With the help of all my action figures and other Rambo toys, I would often recreate scenes from the First Blood: Part 2 movie, at least to the best of my ability. Actually, I think I would also use toys from my G.I. Joe collection, especially for the purposes of replicating aircraft. If you’re familiar with G.I. Joes, you may remember the “Tiger Force” series of the toys. This was a special subset of G.I. Joe toys, maybe even a limited-edition series, but maybe I’m wrong about that latter part. There were a few different Tiger Force military vehicles you could get and I had at least three of these that I can remember: one was a plane (called the Tiger Rat), the other a helicopter (called the Tiger Fly) and the third was a fan boat (the Tiger Shark). I think the fourth vehicle you could get, which I didn’t have, was some sort of armored land vehicle. 

 

The Tiger Rat

The Tiger Shark

The Tiger Fly

The "Tiger Fly" Box


I thought the Tiger Force helicopter I had looked a lot like the helicopter featured in First Blood: Part 2—you know, the one that the villainous Russian commando flies in the movie—so I would use this G.I. Joe Tiger Force helicopter and my official Rambo action figure to recreate the scenes where Rambo is being chased down by the Russian helicopter. I would make a lot of explosion sounds with my mouth, as well as gunfire sounds, the latter of which was accomplished with a talented roll of the tongue against the roof of my mouth. Making gunfire noises with your mouth was an art, man, especially machine gunfire. Do kids even do this anymore? I don’t have kids but I have nephews and I’ve spent a lot of time babysitting various children over the years and, come to think of it, I don’t think I’ve heard them ever make any gunfire noises with their mouth. Is it politically incorrect for kids to do this now? Are boys encouraged to “play guns” as much as they used to be back in the 1980s? In fact, you don’t really see many toy guns being sold in stores anymore, unless they’re of the Nerf variety. Don’t get me wrong: I’m not saying this is a bad thing or necessarily a good thing. Maybe it’s a good thing. Maybe playing with toy guns would be seen today as something that leads to “toxic masculinity,” but I guess another argument can be made that men have become too soft over the recent decades and less masculine. I’m not taking any stance here; I just thought it was something worth thinking about. Maybe I’m simply out of touch. Maybe the kids of today still “play guns” and “play war,” just as much as they used to in the 1980s, and I once again haven’t done my research.

 

As for me? Well, I played Rambo quite a bit and I’m not just talking with toys and action figures, either. I have a vivid memory of being on the school playground during recess when I was in the 1st grade, probably in the 1988 area, and I distinctly remember fantasizing that I was Rambo doing a covert mission and I was being shot at by enemies and I was also even making gun noises with my mouth but not overly loud because I was old enough to know that I would look like a weirdo if I was really obvious about it. No, the fantasy was mostly taking place in my head. Unfortunately, this resulted in a bad “conduct” grade on my school report card, not because I was a bad kid, but because I wasn’t socializing well with others. In fact, I think during parent-teacher conferences, my teacher had to speak to my mother about me not playing with the other kids during recess. Little did the teacher know that I was actually deep in Rambo fantasyland inhabited by me, myself and I. I had no interest in playing with other kids during recess because I wanted to be alone in my world of Rambo. I did eventually “conform,” however, and start playing with the other kids on the playground, mainly to appease my teacher and parents. Playing Rambo by myself was seen as antisocial behavior and, since I lived to please, I had no choice but to properly “socialize myself” and limit Rambo fantasizing to something I did during my at-home playtime but not during school recess. If I were left to my own devices, however, I probably never would have stopped playing Rambo by myself out in public. Maybe I’d still be playing it all the way up to the present day …

 

In May of 1988, Rambo 3 was released. In this third installment of the franchise, Rambo is asked to join a mission where Colonel Trautman and a United States special ops team are providing “Stinger” missiles to Afghan rebels. The missiles will help the rebels fight against the Russians who are imperialistically trying to occupy Afghanistan. Rambo turns the gig down, Colonel Trautman does the mission without him, but Trautman is captured by the Russians and now Rambo needs to rescue him from a Russian base in Afghanistan. Rambo is discovered by the Russians during the rescue. Action ensues …


Rambo 3 movie poster

I’m pretty sure I never saw Rambo 3 in the theater, I think we most likely rented the movie from Video Paradise when it came out on video, but I also know that I must have recorded Rambo 3 off the TV at some point because I remember watching this movie just as obsessively as First Blood: Part 2. I recently was talking about the Rambo franchise with a clerk at a music/video store called FYE (i.e. “For Your Entertainment”) and he said he liked the Rambo movies but that the franchise started going downhill with Rambo 3. Upon doing research on the Internet, it seems as though this is a common consensus, that Rambo 3 is inferior to the first two movies of the franchise. 

 

As for me?

 

Well, I LOVED Rambo 3.

 

As a matter of fact, I think the more I watched Rambo 3, the more I eventually started to like the movie more than its predecessor.

 

I recently rewatched both Rambo 3 and First Blood: Part Two and I was somewhat surprised to find that they still hold up as good movies, at least in my opinion, which may of course be very subjective since I had such an obsession with Rambo as a child. I think what stuck out the most about the movies and what impressed me the most about the movies were the action sequences. When I was young, I took all the action for granted. I had no idea what kind of work went into creating such elaborate action sequences—all the squibs and pyrotechnics, fireballs, helicopter stunts etc. You have to keep in mind that these movies were made well before any CGI, so everything you see is the product of non-digital stunt coordination. The explosions and fireballs are real. The smoking helicopters are real. The gunshots are real. The squibs are real. It’s really quite impressive and it’s crazy to think of all the planning that had to go into such great action scenes. I don’t know if there are any good “making-of” documentaries out there, but I would love to see an extensive behind-the-scenes look at how they created these action sequences in both Rambo 2 and 3.

 

What also stood out about the films, especially First Blood: Part 2, was the soundtrack by Jerry Goldsmith. It’s a fantastic soundtrack, especially the opening theme that features this distorted-sounding bass guitar, something that I don’t think was all that common to hear in the 1980s. It reminds me of the distorted bass you hear a lot in early-1990s Beastie Boys music, particularly in their Check Your Head and Ill Communication albums. Think about the song “Sabotage” and you’ll know what I’m talking about. Goldsmith’s distorted bass motif has a menacing and, frankly, badass sound to it. Again, I’m pretty sure this sound was unique for its time (circa 1985), maybe even unprecedented.



Jerry Goldsmith's First Blood: Part 2 soundtrack

 

The third thing that stood out to me, especially when it came to First Blood: Part 2, was the simplicity of the story. There is a brief setup to the movie within the first few minutes and we immediately know where the story is going, so when the opening titles begin about three minutes in, we know EXACTLY where we’re headed and feel super-pumped when we hear the aforementioned distorted bass sound of the Rambo theme. It’s almost fair to say that the first Act of the story is done within the first few minutes of the movie, basically within the pre-titles sequence. Everything is simple and to-the-point, not much fluff and razzle dazzle. In fact, while I was watching the movie, I was saying to myself that it doesn’t feel like a normal movie to me. It’s so to-the-point that it almost feels like a military documentary or something kind of ‘official’. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but it’s almost as though you are bearing witness to an actual covert military operation and you’re going along for the ride. Does this make sense to anybody? Am I the only one who feels this way?

 

The fourth thing that stood out to me when I rewatched the Rambo movies was how much I remembered the movies, almost shot by shot. In fact, I almost knew what shot was coming before it even happened. Watching the films over and over again at such a young, impressionable age really etched the movies into my memory and they’re apparently still etched into my brain to this day.

 

Along the same lines, I also noticed that, while I was watching the films, I suddenly had this urge to go and play with action figures. I think this “urge” can be explained as both Freudian and Pavlovian. On a psychological level, watching the Rambo movies stimulated the inner child that is still somewhere in my subconscious and this inner child suddenly wanted to go recreate Rambo scenes with action figures. In other words, I don’t think “I” wanted to go play with the toys; rather, it was my inner child that was literally awoken from hibernation through the stimulus that was the Rambo movie. Pavlov’s dogs salivated for treats when they heard a bell because this was how they were mentally conditioned to respond to such a neutral stimulus. Well, the Rambo movies were my bell (i.e. my neutral stimulus) that didn’t make me salivate for treats but they made my inner child want to go play with action figures. Do you understand? It’s a fascinating psychological phenomenon.

 

But, yes, the Rambo movies have certainly held their own as solid action movies after all these years and are all the more impressive when viewed today knowing that they were all made well before the digital era. For budgetary purposes, no studio in their right mind would allow such an action film to be made in this “analog” manner because it would be way too expensive. Why not use CGI and save a few bucks? No general audience knows the difference or cares, right? Action is action, whether done digitally or for real in the analog world, right?

 

WRONG!!!

 

Sorry, didn’t mean to get so angry there.

 

I think the bottom line is that the Rambo films, along with other action films of this era, represent the peak of the action film genre, the high-water mark, the high bar, the … well, that’s all I got. Not that they are the best action films ever made but because of how they were made (i.e. non-digitally). Films started going the way of the digital in the 1990s (thanks, Jurassic Park, way to ruin everything—just kidding, JP is incredible) and I don’t think any action film these days is made in a similar manner to how the Rambo movies were made due to the aforementioned budgetary reasons.

 

As for me, I certainly acknowledge that the Rambo movies are not the best films ever made, but there will always be a place in my heart for them, especially for First Blood: Part 2. Having rewatched the films recently, I was struck by how enjoyable and “into them” I actually was. I was afraid that they wouldn’t entertain me as much as they did when I was a child, but they were actually still VERY entertaining, if not more so, since I was now able to understand Rambo’s backstory a little better than before.

 

Just two days ago from when I’m currently writing this, I went out and bought Rambo 2 and Rambo 3, on DVD, at the aforementioned FYE store. Perhaps I should have gotten Blu-ray or ultra-HD 4K super-DVD or whatever the heck the latest technology is, but I went with the DVDs because a) they weren’t too expensive (only about five bucks for each) and b) they had cool ‘extras’ on them. More than anything else, I simply wanted to make sure that I had a copy of First Blood: Part 2 and Rambo 3 on me at all times so I could watch the movies whenever I had the urge. Sometimes, when the going gets rough in life, all you want to do is watch your favorite film from your childhood, one that is essentially mindless but full of amazing visual action. I guess it’s comfort food for the soul. A guilty pleasure. Who knows, maybe I’ll even stop suppressing my inner child and start fantasizing about being Rambo again. If you see me out anywhere in public and I have a red bandana on and/or I’m creeping around like I’m in the middle of a covert operation and/or I’m making machine gun noises with my mouth, don’t think I’m crazy. Just give me a salute or at least an approving nod—Colonel-Trautman-stye—and then just please go about your business.



MATT BURNS is the author of several novels, including Weird MonsterSupermarket Zombies! and Johnny Cruise. He’s also written numerous memoirs, including GARAGE MOVIE: My Adventures Making Weird FilmsMY RAGING CASE OF BEASTIE FEVERJUNGLE F’NG FEVER: MY 30-YEAR LOVE AFFAIR W/ GUNS N’ ROSES and I TURNED INTO A MISFIT! Check out these books (and many more) on his Amazon author page HERE.

 

Other trending articles by Matt Burns that may be of interest to you:

 

Video Store Memories


Revisiting the Blair Witch Project

 

A Love Letter to the Emerald Square Mall (about the death of the shopping mall age)


NEVER FORGET the Fun-O-Rama (a traveling carnival memoir)


Some Wicked Good Times: A Love Letter to Newbury Comics


I Dream of Dream Machine (a memoir of the local video arcade)


Skateboarding in the 1990s


PROXOS IN THE PLEX: A Goldeneye 007 N64 Retrospective

 

100 DAYS of ZELDA: Revisiting Ocarina of Time

 

I USED TO BE A GAMER: The 8-bit Nintendo Years


WAAF Goes Off the Air


Heeeeeeeeeeeeeere’s Charlie (a story about Burns’ recurring nightmares featuring Charlie Chaplin)


Remembering That Time I Tried to Stop a Shoplifter at the Wrentham Outlets


The Strange, Surreal Moment of Being Called a DILF Inside a Panera Bread Restaurant on a Wednesday Afternoon


Weird Times en la Weirdioteca

 

RIP PowerBook G3


Getting Your Novel Done

 

Getting Your Screenplay Done

 

Making Your Good Writing Great


Writing the Sequel

 

Writing the Trilogy


No-No, Learn to Love the Rejection: Some Sage Advice for Writers in Search of an Agent or Publisher

 

The Story Behind Supermarket Zombies!


The Story Behind The Woman and the Dragon



SOURCES:


[ii] Sahagun, Louis and Peter H. King. “Deputy Slays Teen-ager Wielding Toy Laser Gun.” LA Times, 9 April 1987, https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1987-04-09-mn-363-story.html